What was your "defining moment" that drew you to knighthood/chivalry?

[Joshua Santana]

I know that this late, but I did have a defining moment of Knighthood.

I remember that I was formerly a kung fu and tai chi practitioner (and a crazy one at that!), but I didn't keep my priorities straight.  This got me into trouble and a month's suspension from seeing teacher.  During this time, I tried to train but I was slowly loosing it, I was loosing the will to train.  I even was close to stepping into depression until I randomly decided to youtube chivalry.  Surprisingly, I watched a video that discussed and answered the question 'What is Chivalry."  I first thought that this was just a philosophical approach to the idea, but I was wrong.  I was immediately drawn into the idea and did some research and even found my role model, mentor and new found friend Sir Karl Kindt via a news video that showcased him.

After some time, I then discovered that i always believed that being the gentleman was the way to live life, what i didn't know that being a gentleman (or the concept of being a gentleman) cane from the Virtues and Principles of Chivalry!  This hit me like a thunderbolt, I always dreamed of being a Knight and I discovered that we inherently have that freedom, to live life as a quest.

Then on March 7, 2010 I swore myself and christened myself a Knight.  The past year was hard yet rewarding, I now look back and see that the hard work of adapting myself and my behaviors to the Code of Chivalry was worth it.  After passing my first Oath renewal, I have tasted the good chivalrous life. I used to be shy and secretive, but now I am confident in myself and have new courage to even tell a college classroom that "I am a Knight."  This has and always will be the best decision of my life, even recently I have been changing my habits both at college, work and home. heck, when one of my co-workers was having an emotional breakdown, I just stopped what i was doing, ran to the bathroom, pulled up a couple of tissues, ran back and gave them to her.  She thanked for me for it, even though I could have got into trouble for that , but my supervisor was impressed!  If that is not Chivalry, then I don't know what is! (lol!)

[Sir William]

That is an excellent story, Sir Joshua.  Well done.

[Lord Dane]

Hmmm... I've always had an interest in medieval history & knights. Hard to say when exactly I wanted to pursue that interest but I've always loved fantasy, epics, medieval lore, mythology & been an avid gamer most of my life. Plus, I've studied Japanese martial arts & swordfighting most of my life. Eventually, I became an instructor in both Aikido and weapons so my familiarity with swords and bo-staff kind of evolved into medieval pursuits. My love of Asian martial arts turned into one for Western martial arts & I studied all I could. Professionally, I am in law enforcement and became a weapons & tactical trainer so fighting forms/combat training and weapons are a natural part of 'knighthood'. I've always loved the lore of knights and history of the Crusader era. Born & raised Roman Catholic, it gave me more perspective & helped me gain an interest in biblical times, archaeology, and the mystique of the Crusader monastic orders as well as medieval lore. From that came more interest in my own family history, heraldry, etc.

However, I didn't really dive into my medieval passtime at ren-faires & knightly pursuits until meeting my wife in 2007. Since 2008, I've turned my medieval passtime into a passion & have done it ever since (w/ my wife). No regrets & look forward to much more involvement in it. However (as I get older), I am realizing that the notion of Chivalry & knighthood is more a concentration of how you live your life & measured by that same standard religiously. Making knighthood not just a passtime but a real part of who you are & strive to be as a person. 

Self-improvement is all about learning from your mistakes, listening to others, and experiencing life through your own trials. Learning to accept your frailties, and stengthen your abilities is part of this process. Always strive to better yourself morally, mentally, and physically makes you live up to a more noble ideal and reflects the concepts of Chivalrous virtue. It's an ideal I would love to make happen in my life.

[Sir Sorbus]

I was brought up to be a gentleman, a Christian, and a scholar.
15 years old, and my best friend was a bit unstable. He was a good guy, very intelligent, and like me in so many ways that people thought we were brothers, and we let me, but he was too confident, arrogant, and attention seeking for his own good. I was calmer, and shyer. We rubbed off on each other. I kept him in line, and out of trouble, and he made me more adventurous and talkative.
But then he and I fell for the same girl, and whilst he were friends on the surface, he stopped trusting me underneath, and saw any advice I gave as a ploy to break them up, and claim her for myself. It wasn't. I wished them the best, even if I did love her, but he didn't believe me.
So, my controlling influence out of the way, he became very outgoing and troublemaking. I stayed friends with him, trying to bring it back to how we were, and he got in with a bad crowd simultaneously. As a result, my trying to look after him whilst he really didn't care about me anymore meant I ended up in a gang, and did some things that I am not proud of. Nothing illegal, I was very careful about that. But, oh, the road of good intentions.
He became extremely paranoid and over-protective of this girl. She is the type to need her own space, and couldn't take his suffocating of her, so she broke up with him, and he naturally blamed me, and finished going off the rails.
He dropped out of school, started getting deep into drugs and alcohol, ran away from home, and hung out with a bunch of less-than-desirable people. It was at this point that I painfully turned my back on him, and tried to undo the damage that looking after him had caused. With the guilt of thinking I had destroyed the life of my best friend under my belt, and weighing me down, I started searching for a way to redeem myself.
It took about a year to find new friends, but I eventually did, and together, we formed the Order of New Chivalry. We are doing all we can to restore knightly virtues and general chivalry to the world, and whilst we're off to a slow start, we're still strong, and have a lot left in us yet.

On the side note, the girl also went off the rails for a bit due to that, among other things, but both he and she are turning themselves around now, however slowly.

So yeah. That's my story, in a nutshell. I'm trying to make up for a past filled with good intentions and bad outcomes. I was brought up on chivalry as a young boy, but whilst good, I never really embraced it. Then I had a rough few years, and came back stronger than ever, if a little sore.

[Sir Edward]

I've found that sometimes people have to hit rock-bottom before they cab bounce back upward. That downward momentum can be difficult to stop, but there are opportunities to turn it around.

I'm glad to hear that everyone involved is improving, Sir Sorbus. I truly believe that one's past does not have to define who a person is, that you can reinvent yourself, and what you choose to do today matters more than what you chose to do in years past.

Forming an Order of chivalry is a wonderful way to improve the lives of everyone involved!

[Joshua Santana]

Forming an Order of chivalry is a wonderful way to improve the lives of everyone involved!

Indeed Sir Edward.

I have posted here early but there is other moments of chivalry that is worth mentioning here.

I must remind that ever since March 7 of 2010, I have lived through a three year journey of constant improvement and at times falling down by mistakes only to learn and get back up afterwards.



I recall in early 2012, this was in the later part of my relationship with the dame (as seen on facebook).  I remember that I was enjoying the relationship but yet I felt I was loosing myself to becoming something that I didn't recognize.  I was becoming disrespectful to my parents and family.  I was slowly turning back to my olde perfectionist habits.  Upon this realization I decided to turn back to my Christian Faith and to following the Code of Chivalry. 

When I began to practice my reclaiming of my beliefs, they were challenged by the dame.  In addition I landed a new job and worked full time.  This eliminated any chances of seeing her for a month.  She never appreciated that nor my habit of following my parents' decisions (since I do not have the resources to leave their house).  This was not the first time my beliefs were challenged.  They were challenged in several classes and by several people. 

Eventually I began to regain my chivalric self, but with a terrible price.  Restoring and regaining my Honor with my God and Family.  Trying to help a dame with some issues (will not be mentioned) as best I can, proved to be quite a moral dilemma.

This lead to a heated argument between me and her.  Her argument was summed in "i should be my own individual with your family" or "You need to stop listening to your parents".  I got mad and viewed it as her way of dissing me.  In the end, I chose God and Family over my lats girlfriend.  This was my way of living by Honor and my parents appreciated it greatly.   


Another moment I recall is when I began to tell my fellow co-workers at my job about me living by the Code of Chivalry and showing pictures of me from NHSC.  There was a waitress that I knew from High School and she invited me to a drink on my Birthday (I worked on my Birthday which was fun).  However I told her that I don't drink.  My reason is that relations in my Family (via my Father's side and Mother's side) died from alcoholism.  My parents are the only two people to stop this drinking tradition.  I heard my parents talk about this issue and they warned me not to drink.  I made a promise to them to not drink because of their accounts of relatives and grand parents dying from drinking alcohol.  I told this to my co-workers and they understood and respected my choice not to drink.  I recall leaving my job with a feeling that said "well done".   

[Sir Brian]

Well done indeed Joshua. I commend your resolve and courage to hold to your beliefs and your vows. If you cannot stand before the scrutinizing gaze of that man in your mirror than where can you stand? 

[Lord Dane]

Well done indeed Joshua. I commend your resolve and courage to hold to your beliefs and your vows. If you cannot stand before the scrutinizing gaze of that man in your mirror than where can you stand? 

Huzzah for Joshua!! Now while he stands for principle, I'm going to indulge in temptation by sitting down & enjoying several cold apple Hard-Ciders. Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! Sir Brian, time to kick back at the tavern!!!

[Joshua Santana]

I thank you Milord Dane and do enjoy your Cider while I drink the Wine of Wisdom.   

Well done indeed Joshua. I commend your resolve and courage to hold to your beliefs and your vows. If you cannot stand before the scrutinizing gaze of that man in your mirror than where can you stand?

My thanks to you Sir Brian, very true indeed.

[Corvus]

You know, just when I think I have read pretty much everything on this forum I discover something I missed earlier.

This is a very cool thread. If no one minds terribly I would like to add my own tale.

I have walked the road of the Warrior since I was very young. Even when I was small I was always playing at being the knight or the Viking or the western 'good guy' like Roy Rogers, the Lone Ranger or Zorro. I took up martial arts as a lad too, and made achievements for myself in Judo, Karate and Kung fu before I was very far into my teens.

I left home the first time when I was only 13. I lived in a tough neighborhood to begin with and my situation was made even tougher when I wandered into an area we call the Downtown East Side. This part of town is a veritable danger zone - full of gangsters, drug dealers, pimps, you name it they are there.
Anyway there I lived with a bunch of other young rascals for some time. Things could have gone pretty bad for me down there with all the bad influences and all, yet there was always something inside me that kept me from getting too mixed up in the petty crimes that a lot of my friends were doing. One night my fortunes changed when, as I was getting roughed up near Chinatown by two cops I was 'rescued' by two Chinese monks from a local monastery. They passed me on to a kindly gentleman who, although local people thought of him as a sorcerer, had spent a good number of years helping street youth. He gave me shelter and food and after awhile even helped me reconnect with my family and return home. I learned a lot from old Mr. Woo in a very short time and while I was with him he rekindled in me some of the gentlemanly ways I had been taught as a much younger lad.

So I credit Mr. Woo with being the first one to help me get a step up as a troubled youth. I went back to school and cleaned up my act considerably.

A few years later, as I was beginning to look into my dual heritage (I believe I mentioned that I am part Celt and part Native American in my intro) I made the acquaintance of some of my Native relations who I had never known before. One of these was my Grandfather from that side of the fence, so to speak. We got along famously and he took it upon himself to teach me all he could about the path he walked, which was that of the Warrior but also of the Medicine Man. It was through Grandpa that I really learned who and what I was and how to serve the balance in nature. In the short years I was granted with him, I learned so much that in retrospect it makes my head spin thinking about it.  It was because of my Grandpa that I came to understand what it was to be a man and about what the sacred responsibilities of men are - to their fellow man and also to the sacred Earth. When I was around 20 I was prepared for and given my coming-of age ritual: 30 days in mountain wilderness with only a small backpack of supplies a knife and a blanket.

When I returned from my ordeal I was given a party and honored by my Grandpa and a good number of my other relations. I had been transformed from a boy into a man and more than that, I had become the Warrior I had always sought to be. My Grandfather encouraged me strongly to go back to school and so I did. I began attending college and would eventually, because of his confidence and encouragement, eventually find myself studying anthropology and psychology at the University of BC.

Time passed and one day my Grandpa asked for my presence at his home. When I arrived we went fishing and as we fished he told me that he had been diagnosed with a particularly nasty form of cancer... and that he had been told it was terminal.

My world came crashing down around my ears. Grandpa told me that he would never see the inside of a hospital - that he would never die in a hospital bed. He was a Warrior and would die like one.

Months later he did as he said and disappeared into the northern Canadian wilderness, walking his last ceremony, and was never seen again. To add to this tragedy, my blood-brother, Russell had been killed in an accident earlier that year and following my Grandfather's long walk my uncle Emmett who had been my Grandfather's best friend and bro for over sixty years also passed away.

I fell into a deep gloom and became very withdrawn at this loss. I wandered into the mountains at the beginning of winter thinking that I would simply allow myself to got to sleep in the snow somewhere and never wake up.

Yet it was during this time I experienced a powerful Vision as I sat in a cold camp above the snow line. It was my Grandfather directing me to not waste the gifts I had been given. He ordered me to bring honor to our ways and to get back down to the bottom of the mountain. He told me that I would find a new teacher waiting to help me further my learning.

So I did as I was told and returned to the trailhead. There I found a good friend of my Grandfather's waiting for me in his truck. I was astonished by this as I had told no one of my plans  or where I was going.

My Grandfather's friend, Ari did as I had been foretold: He took me under his wing and helped me walk the next step in my journey and it was he who finally brought me into the Order that I serve today. I don't know if I would be the man I am today had it not been for him and the new road he showed me.

I guess the moral of the story is that the road of the Warrior is not easy: It is like hiking up a twisting, uphill trail with a heavy pack and obstacles blocking the way at every turn. There are many challenges and the way we respond to these will determine what kind of man we become in the end.

 

[Lord Tristin]

I was always drawn to my families past, and enthralled by games like D&D and Elder scrolls. The real attraction to Chivalry came when I heard the story of my ancestors and how they lived. One particular ancestor stands out to me. A Man form my family once stood up for his queens honor, accusing her family of abusing her power due to her illness. the de facto regent stripped him of his title and sentenced him to death. rather than die like a dog he choose to challenge the regent to a duel, the regent of course used a stand in, a talented young warrior. He defeated the young knight and then fought of several men at arms before being cut down by crossbows. His sacrifice was the catalyst for the fall of the regents power after the Queen's death. The regent and his supporters ended up hanging.

[Corvus]

This fellow sounds like a truly valiant man, Tristin! A good role model indeed.

[Lord Tristin]

I have one quote. I can't say I invented it, but it was used by my family for  generations I don't know if they invented it.

"Live what you say you believe."

[Lord Chagatai]

Well, my defining moment came in 2006, although I have had an interest in Knights and the code all the way back to my childhood. In 2006, I lost my mom and had never really treated her like I should have growing up and I was upset that I had not had the chance to say goodbye or even try to change anything I had done in the past by becoming a great son and taking care of her and my Dad. That was the day that I vowed to follow the code no matter what happens in my life. There have been times that I have fallen off that path but some how my faith just keeps bringing me back. I had also found the SCA once again in 2001-2002 and was playing the game with some great people that taught me the code not only worked well within the SCA but you could bring to your everyday life.

In 2007, I lost another family member my step daughter, but for all intent and purposes my daughter. You was weak from past years of bad decisions, my wife and I stepped up and helped her try and get over where she had fallen too. So this is where my FAITH came into question, I thought to myself that "why would GOd take someone so young and getting back to where she needed to be" "why would he do it when she was at the tip of the hole she had dug herself into"...I turned to my Knight for answers and he discussed with me that it is not our job to question what was done but to find humility in it and become humbled because he gave her to you and that he used his power to bring her to where she was when she was taken.

Nowadays, I strive to live by the code in everything I do. I try to remain humble and not really boast about things but first and foremost help the weak, and stay true to my faith. I think that of all the virtues, FAITH is the one that I struggle with the most. I question mine on a daily basis and have not figured out how to just let myself go...


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[Joshua Santana]

LrdMurchadth, Corvus, Lord Tristin, amazing testimonials and this encourages me to go one everyday with Chivalry.  Thank you and I also encourage you to continue to live with Knightly Honor and Courage.