Here are some good ones from the original thread on myarmoury
You know that you´ve been into armour for too long;
When at the restaurant you ask "if the 'Main Salad' is raised from one piece?"
When you see a beautiful woman in a corset but all you think of is a plackart.
When you start to feel scorn towards stainless steel, in general, not just when armour is made from it.
When you laugh at todays clothing and their lack of absorption from sword-blows.
When 'mail' is no longer letters on your doorstep..
When you start to spell "e-mail", "e-maille".
When you walk down to the store and feel the awkward emptiness of not having a weapon by your side.
When getting beaten with a rattan-pole for two hours are synonymous to "a good time".
When the smell of oil, metal and leather is the smell of home.
When a historical timeline is sorted not by decades but by armour-designs.
When you know more about the fashion in 1405 then in 2005.
When you accidently walk in to your office wearing pauldrons.
When you look at a VW bug and think "Heh, I can take it."
When buying a car you reprimand the the manufacturers for making so many chinks in the body.
When you attend Pennsic Razz
When in a physical confrontation you yell "Squire! fetch my cuirass!"
When you tie pots and pans to your legs because you miss the sound of clanking metal.
When you forget how zippers work.
When you wear a kettle hat to the beach.
When you absentmindedly toss a load of maille into the washing machine.
When you turn your ballcap around backwards "for better visibility", and for that German Sallet tail feel on your neck.
When, while at the museum IN the armour exhibit and are asked to read the plackard, you closely examine the breastplate for marks or engravings, neglecting the little card beside it.
When shopping for new boots, you consider if they'll fit inside your greaves and sabatons.
When suddenly a college marching band uniform is quite light.
When you know someone as 'Sir Edmund of Caddington' but 4 years later, you still don't know his real name.
When a clarinet could somehow double as a javelin or saxophone as a war hammer.
When that small device on your belt is your dagger and not your cell phone.
When your friends say "see you later," and you say "fare thee well."
When you see Obi-Wan's lightsaber and say "that could be a Type XVII."
When you accidentally strike the ceiling fan with your sword and you're more worried about damaging the fan.
When everything you buy online comes from 'Mike' or 'Craig.'
When the only state flag you recognize is Maryland's.
When bread and water really is a meal.
When someone asks you if your sword is real and you respond with "you mean is it functional?"
When you try to convince your child's football coach to break up their line with a cavalry charge.
When you start cooking your meals in your old pot helm.
When rust starts to form on your skin.
When you can write some of these jokes out of personal experience.
When you forget to take off your gauntlet before shaking hands with your boss.
When you have to remember to take off your gauntlets before shaking hands with your boss.
When you show up at your friend's wedding in your best, newly polished harness.
When you are dragged out of a movie theatre because you keep telling the guy beside you all of the defensive holes in King Arthurs fighting style.
When you chase a fly around your house, greave in hand.
When you take 9 hours going through the metal detectors at the airport.
When you take 12 hours trying to explain to the customs agents you are on your way to an SCA event.
When you take 34 hours to regain consciousness after you exclaim "I am a knight of the East Kingdom! Have at you!"
When, on the night before Christmas, visions of Albions dance in your head.
When you want to name your first son Ewart, Hans, Fiore etc. (actually, make that first child)
When you find yourself smirking or laughing at dramatic swordplay.
When you buy a suit a few sizes too large to accomodate a gambeson.
When you have trouble with Roman numerals up to X and after XXII.
When, in your library, you actually have a 'Chivalry Bookshelf'.
When the only German you know is words such as 'oberhau'.
When you find wearing a belt to be instinctive.
When you wear greaves and sabatons to soccer (football) matches.
If you are disappointed when you learn that the bayonet is not a soldier's primary weapon.
When you wonder why people are swimming with cutting targets.
