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A Knight and Love

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Mike W.:
As I recently stated in another post, my opinion of chivalry (in its purest and ahistorical sense) is not some rigorous code with various rules and exceptions, but rather one simple rule: Love others. Or if you're a religious type: "Love your neighbor as you love yourself." And loving yourself doesn't mean narcissistic, arrogant love, but a nurturing, caring, and disciplined love necessary to make ourselves better so that we may better serve others.

Romantic love is something that we can become blessed with in our lives, but it is no way a requirement for being a good person. Now mind you all of this is from an ahistorical perspective. Sadly, I am not entirely familiar with the historical rules and rituals of romantic and courtly love.

SirNathanQ:
The resident Teutonic Knight and single guy takes a moment to confirm that a lady isn't NEEDED to be a knight, just a nice bonus!  ;)
The thing is, you usually get the damsels after you start acting knightly. Few things the ladies like more than non-douchey confidence.  :)

Sir William:
"Moistened bint" - I've not heard that term in years, but it is a favorite of mine.  lol

In any case, the art of courtly love really started in the Angevin era, per Wikipedia, in the ducal and princely courts of Aquitaine, Provence, Champagne, ducal Burgundy and the Norman Kingdom of Sicily at the end of the eleventh century. In essence, courtly love was an experience between erotic desire and spiritual attainment that now seems contradictory as "a love at once illicit and morally elevating, passionate and disciplined, humiliating and exalting, human and transcendent".

The whole point of chivalry (from a historical standpoint) was to institute a set of rules and regulations so that those of the knightly orders would have something besides maiming and killing as their joie de vivre.  It was to make natural born killers (and in a lot of cases, rapists, thieves, usurers, outright murderers even) into something like normal human beings; it was better than doing nothing at all I suppose.  What wilburnicus suggests as his definition of chivalry should not be confused with what chivalry was  back then- and love had little to do with it.

Courtly love should not be confused with what is shared between a man and wife; while it is true much of what a man and woman do behind closed doors may seem similar, it isn't always the case.  Not to mention, with courtly love, there was no guarantee that said love would ever be consummated (although it was, and often as history has shown us).

Sir Nathan, you are a consummate gentleman and a scholar. 

Sir James A:

--- Quote from: DouglasTheYounger on 2014-02-20, 16:59:04 ---Courtly love is certainly an...odd concept, if I understand it correctly. In theory, wasn't it basically the idea that a knight would love and pine after a lady he knew he could never have, usually because she/he/both were already married? It was considered a purer form of love or something like that.

--- End quote ---

Yep. The name escapes me, but I remember someone who was married and had "courtly love" with a married woman. He hurt his finger at tournament and wrote to her about it. She said not good enough. He cut off his finger and sent it to her.

I don't plan to be *that* knightly. :)

I believe part of the intent of "courtly" love followed "courting" - the process men go through when trying to win a woman's love. As Sir William said, I also don't think it was ever particularly meant to be consumated, though it certainly did happen in some instances.

Aiden of Oreland:
Lets not forget how the table cracked.

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