ModernChivalry.org
Main => The Round Table => Topic started by: Sir Patrick on 2011-02-03, 05:48:52
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Came across this post on another forum. I think his response to the situation is commendable, and illustrates an EXCELLENT point: You are not a knight most in victory, but in defeat.
http://forums.armourarchive.org/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=129406 (http://forums.armourarchive.org/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=129406)
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I absolutely agree with what he's saying. How we conduct ourselves in hard times, and in defeat, is a real test of our character. It's easy to be polite and honorable when the conditions are favorable. It's not so easy when we feel hurt, betrayed, and demoralized. My hat's off to this gentleman for holding to his principles under devastating circumstances.
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I'll allow that in my humble opinion, he is a better man than me. He is in dire straits due to that woman's machinations- and she knew she felt this way before she asked him to move up. To my mind, she's not worthy of his chivalrous behavior but I will agree that no matter the occasion, chivalry should always hold forth and ring true. Its just a lot easier said than done and I really, really feel for Ivan, that's a horrible situation to be in- made worse by the fact that it could've been avoided had she had some semblance of integrity.
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That's true, her actions were despicable. Thankfully he's not advocating being a door-mat. He fully intends to move out and move on as soon as he is able, but in the meantime he's not going to stoop to petty destructive behavior.
Chivalry doesn't demand that we tolerate being wronged, of course. I think in cases like this, it's best to excise the person from your life, like a cancerous tumor.
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The more I think about what happened to Ivan, the more I realize how much farther down the path I need to travel. I honestly don't kow if I could get through that with as much grace. I think he'd make a fine addition over here, and sent him a pm inviting him to check us out. His last post said he'd be traveling a few days, but after he gets home maybe we'll hear from him.
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Sir Red Knight, he sounds like he'd be an admirable addition- not to mention the wisdom he no doubt can dispense to those of us who need to travel further down that path. I'm with you...I lack the grace he evidently possesses. I would say that it is something I need to work on...really need to work on. Mine tends to mirror the antagonist's - I know tit for tat is not knightly, but I've always struggled with how to deal when wronged. For my part it isn't such a big deal but for others- like Ivan for instance, I don't even know him and yet I can feel the wrath bubbling beneath the surface, almost as if it were ME she did that to.
Sir Edward, that is an excellent analogy...excise her like a cancer...testicular cancer at that.
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One of the nice things about that thread is how other members were willing to put him up for the night and feed him on his trip back home. Hopefully that will help him keep his head high, as he already seems to be doing.
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As well they should come together, as we would were it to happen to one of our own. That's kind of amazing, actually...I tend to view this world as a hardline cynic, but the true beauty of the human spirit never ceases to surprise me. I'm glad there are still decent people in the world because sometimes- it just doesn't seem so.